Are We Having Fun Yet?

The Magic of Conflict

Arm wrestling

I would not want all my words
To parade around this world in pretty costumes,
So I will tell you something of the barroom view of love.
Love is grabbing hold of the great lion's mane
And wrestling and rolling deep into existence
While the beloved gets rough and begins to maul you alive.
True love, my dear, is putting an ironclad grip
Upon the soft, swollen balls of a divine rogue elephant
And not having the good fortune to die.

Hafiz, "A Barroom View of Love"


In community, in personal relationships, and in yourself, conflict is not only inevitable but necessary. It's how we handle conflict that matters. Confrontation can be creative, not destructive. What might be discouraging, dysfunctional drama today can be, with a little skill and perspective, a source of passionate excitement tomorrow. Conflict can actually be fun: it’s called SPORTS.

Through a variety of group games and challenges, stories, movie excerpts, and honest sharing, we’ll explore:

            • how disagreement can build self-awareness, connection, and trust
            • the difference between engagement and fighting or arguing
            • why stalemates happen and how to get past them
            • why trying to change someone‚Äôs mind never works
            • how to get past "right" and "wrong" thinking
            • how to shift the conversation from what you don't want to what you do want
            • hearing the needs behind judgments instead of taking offense
            • expressing anger or disappointment without judgment or blame
            • remembering to appreciate and cherish each other

Friendly disputes can be nourishing, satisfying, and growthful. If you can't beat ’em, enjoy ’em! Make conflict creative and have fun with your life.